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  • Writer's pictureBrian

FRIENDS - J. Cole

Updated: Apr 23, 2020


I love this song. I think it is beautiful and deep. I like to play it when I notice an attachment to friends is preventing me from surfacing subconscious emotions.


"Cop another bag and smoke today" (Addictive/routine mindset)


"I got thoughts, can't control (Suppression of emotions via thoughts)

Got me down, got me low

Rest my mind, rest my soul

When I blow, when I blow (Addictive mindset used to avoid emotions)

Am I wrong, let them know (Self-judgment for addiction)

Feels so right to let things go

Don't think twice, this is me

This is how I should be" (Identification with addiction)


"But I'm aggravated without it

My saddest days are without it

My Saturdays are the loudest

I'm blowing strong" (Suppression of emotions via drugs)


"Fuck did you expect, you can blame it on condition

Blame it on crack, you can blame it on the system

Blame it on the fact that 12 got jurisdiction

To ride around in neighborhoods that they ain't ever lived in

Blame it on the strain that you feel when daddy missing

Blame it on Trump shit, blame it on Clinton

Blame it on trap music and the politicians

Or the fact that every black boy wanna be Pippen

But they only got 12 slots on the Pistons

Blame it on the rain, Milli Vanilli with the disk skip

What I'm tryna say is the blame can go deep as seas

Just to blame 'em all I would need like twenty CD's

There's all sorts of trauma from drama that children see

Type of shit that normally would call for therapy

But you know just how it go in our community

Keep that shit inside it don't matter how hard it be"


This shows the deeper layer of the addiction. It is not an addiction to drugs itself. It is an addiction to blaming one's external reality for their internal issues. In this case, it is the traumatic emotions that people bottle up and suppress.


"Fast forward, them kids is grown and they blowing trees

And popping pills due to chronic anxiety

I been saw the problem but stay silent 'cause I ain't Jesus

This ain't no trial if you desire go higher please

But fuck that now I'm older I love you 'cause you my friend

Without the drugs I want you be comfortable in your skin

I know you so I know you still keep a lot of shit in

You running from yourself and you buying product again

I know you say it helps and no I'm not trying to offend

But I know depression and drug addiction don't blend

Reality distorts and then you get lost in the wind

And I done seen the combo take niggas off the deep end

One thing about your demons they bound to catch up one day

I'd rather see you stand up and face them than run away

I understand this message is not the coolest to say

But if you down to try it I know of a better way

Meditate"


This brings us back to the present. On the surface, we see drug addiction and anxiety. However, now we understand the traumatic emotions that can drive these addictions. The verse finishes with J. Cole offering a solution.


Meditation!


In this scenario, meditation helps us be present with these uncomfortable emotions without fighting them off or suppressing them. This is when the healing process starts.


Add this song to your Sacral Chakra playlist!


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